Still waters ...

So I was home Saturday night, catching up on my laundry, when a friend from D.C. called to chat. She was watching the “2010 Miss America Pageant,” which I had forgotten was airing. So I tuned in, and we immediately began critiquing the contestants.

“Oooh, check out the bad weave on Miss so and so!”

“Did you catch the dance routine by Miss so and so? If that’s talent, then I could be Miss America.”

My friend and I discussed how out-of-fashion the pageant had become and how we lost interest over the years. I had stopped watching it after fellow-Mizzou grad Debbye Turner became Miss America in 1990. And my friend recalled the delight of two sistas winning back-to-back crowns in 2003 (Erika Harold) and 2004 (Ericka Dunlap). (Note that both of us are African-Americans so we take extra pride in these (seemingly frivolous) achievements.)

We were gabbing away when we noticed that Miss Virginia (who was wearing the most unfortunate sequined canary yellow mermaid gown that was so ill-fitting the girl could barely breathe in it, let alone walk in it) made the top seven! As the runners-up were named and the pool dwindled to three contestants, our anticipation grew. Could Miss Virginia win this thing? Then Mario “My Abs Are Too Sexy for This Tux” Lopez announced the 2010 Miss America: Miss Virginia. Caressa Cameron. A SISTA!

We yelled. We gushed. We (air) high-fived each other. Once we calmed down, my friend said goodbye so she could call her mother to yell and gush with her.

What a night. Not only was it a thrill to witness a woman of color win the crown, but it was heartening to know that since Vanessa Williams broke the color barrier as the first black Miss America in 1984 (despite a scandal forcing her to relinquish the crown to Suzette Charles, another African-American beauty queen) Miss America can be beautiful - and African-American - and no one bats an eye. We have overcome.

The aftermath of the earthquake in Haiti is overwhelmingly sad. Hundreds of thousands of people dead. More than a million are homeless. Water, food and tents are scarce. I’m touched by all the humanitarian aid pouring in from the Red Cross and other international relief organizations as well as celebrities such as Wyclef Jean (Yele), George Clooney (“Hope for Haiti Now” telethon) and Chelsea Clinton (spinning fund-raiser).  But I grow incensed when people use religion to justify why such calamities occur. The Rev. Pat Robertson’s comments are especially hurtful because they preach an overly simplistic view of life: When you’re good, God allows you to prosper, but when you’re bad, God rains down his wrath on a sinful people.

Did these Christians forget the story of Job? The Old Testament biblical figure was highly esteemed by God for his religious ardor. If the idea of theodicy holds true - which New Yorker writer James Wood so artfully explores in his New York Times op-ed piece on Sunday - Job should have been spared from suffering because of his piety. A bet between God and the Devil led to Job’s torment: the death of his children, the boils on his body and the jeering by family and friends to curse God and die. Turns out bad things happen to good people and vice versa. As Job said, “What? Shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?”

A wise friend and I talked about Haiti and the woes it has endured over the centuries. But rather than viewing the tragedy as a condemnation by God, she saw it as a sign of hope. That we - the world - can help our fellow brothers and sisters rebuild their country to the state it deserves to be: a society where families can work, feed and educate their children and live in security and peace.

God isn’t punishing Haiti for a test failed. God is testing us to see if we’ll be His hands, arms, and hearts of compassion. Thankfully, some of us are rising to the challenge.

While browsing for information about a curl de-frizzer on Naturallycurly.com, I saw an ad for Diva Smooth, which is touted as an alternative to chemically straightened hair.

Hmmm. I was intrigued because I’m always looking for products to transform my curls into straight locks. So I followed the link to Janelle Beauty hair supply and discovered all the benefits of this so-called alternative. According to the site, Diva Smooth “is based on a finely tuned mixture of all natural ingredients that when applied together with a flat-iron, your hair comes out naturally smooth and healthy.” Apparently, the product also helps prevent hair loss and breakage — and can be used  on any texture of hair.

Wow! Is this too good to be true?

So, I Googled some hair reviews to see what real women had to say about Diva Smooth. Clicking on Longhaircareforum.com, a hair care and beauty resource for women of color, I got the 411 on how well Diva Smooth works. One chica had a bit of a struggle applying the product to her hair, saying that “the mixture is very sticky and it can tend to be somewhat drippy.” She compares it to combing honey through your strands. (Eeek!) But overall, she gave Diva Smooth a mixed thumbs-up. “My hair looks good! It IS straight and shiny  … I honestly cannot tell if the PRODUCT did anything to straighten it or if the HEAT did it.”

For those who want to save a little cash, another woman on the forum provides the link for a recipe that gals (or guys) can whip up themselves at home. The ingredients? Honey, olive oil, bananas, molasses, cornstarch water, vinegar, and wheat germ oil. Very interesting.

My conclusion? I’m not willing to plunk down $40 for the luxury of tugging a honey concoction through my nappy roots especially when I would get the same results from simply blow-drying and Chi-ing my hair? Let’s just say that I’ll pass on this “alternative,” buy a box of Dark & Lovely relaxer and call it a day.

Ted Kennedy — the late-great political lion from Massachusetts who defended the underdogs in life — would be ROILING after hearing the news of Republican Scott Brown’s victory in the U.S. Senate race. Were he alive, he might’ve expressed the same sentiment that a friend of mine stated so wittily on her Facebook page:

Nicole … wonders if Britain would take Massachusetts back after all these years?

Listening to National Public Radio’s coverage of the race between Brown and Attorney General Martha Coakley while I was in Boston last week, I sensed that the race would be a nail-biter. Some Democratic analysts (Dems Question Why Brown Is Gaining on Coakley) said that Coakley had coasted a little bit, perhaps relying too much upon the state’s historic Democratic leanings to push her to a win. But I guess Brown’s persistence, buff bod and the deep pockets of the GOP persuaded voters otherwise. Let’s hope the post-campaign pseudo-conciliatory tone Brown struck in interviews today remains after he’s sworn in so that Kennedy may rest in peace.

I am a volunteer mediator at the Austin Dispute Resolution Center, where I facilitate dialogue between people with unresolved conflicts: child custody, property damage, real estate, interpersonal relationships, etc. Through mediation, people can talk in a safe, neutral place in which a mediator can guide the parties toward greater understanding and (hopefully) an agreement of their own making.

Occasionally, I will use my blog to address hot-botton disputes for the purpose of educating my readers or creating a forum for discussion. I’d like to center my first blog discussion around employees’ use of social networking sites and personal e-mail accounts and the possible thorns they create at the workplace or during a job search. Will a job seeker’s Facebook photo albums come to haunt her one day when an employer sees pics of her topless on her Miami Beach vacay? Are employees held liable for opening unsolicited and/or inappropriate e-mails through their personal Yahoo or Gmail accounts during work hours? Can your tweet about getting trashed at a happy hour the night before lead to termination if you call in sick to work the next day?

What’s the saying? E is for evidence? So be careful not to give a future employer any ammo for not hiring you.

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